Tuesday, May 22, 2018
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Joker

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Faraway Books

Q: What does a book have when it's far away? A: A pager.

Nick DiPaolo: Face Lift

The skin on their face is so tight, it looks like they pulled a condom over a pumpkin, but their neck's got more...

The Shooting

An old lady's husband had just died and she felt their was no reason to live anymore. She called the doctor and asked...

Richard Lewis: Did You Have an Orgasm?

We made love, and I thought she had an orgasm. I said, 'Well, did you have an orgasm?' She said, 'Yeah, but I...

Politicians & Screwdrivers

Q: What's the difference between a politician and a screwdriver?A: A screwdriver turns in screws; politicians screw interns.

A Woman’s Four Favorite Animals

Q: What are a woman's four favorite animals?A: A mink in the closet, a Jaguar in the garage, a tiger in the bedroom...

Blonde’s Car Preferences

Q: Why does a blond prefer BMW over Chevrolet? A: She can spell BMW.

Eddie Brill: Accurate Forecast

If I was in charge of the weather and I wanted to get it right, you hire people with arthritis to do the...

Clinton Jackson: Carnival Games

You're not gonna win, but that's all you're thinking about is winning, right? You don't even think about the fact that the game...

Tom Cotter: Stupid Expressions

Bright-eyed and bushy tailed.' What the hell is that? Bright-eyed and bushy tailed is a squirrel on crack -- that's what that is....